Saga of the Ground Hog

Today's the day. Tom got that darn ol' ground hog. It's a critter that's been pestering him for over a year now. A big fat ugly one too boot.
It invaded the back yard over a year ago and Tom did what he could to send it to the neighbors but he really liked his back yard. There is a deck off the family room to the back yard and that's where this awesome but ugly ground hog decided to winter... He dug a hole under the deck and would slip in and out as he pleased. Tom put up some boards to block off the hole but that little critter -- well, really not so little, dug a hole right beside it.
Tom got some cinder blocks, that didn't work. He (Tom *;*) told me how he thought about putting a flare under the deck but he figured with his luck it would start the house on fire... Well, our friends say if we didn't have bad luck we wouldn't have any at all.... enough said on that one. So the flare idea was out. Then he thought about using a shot gun and figured that would just put holes in the deck floor and he still wouldn't get that critter. Didn't want to take that chance either. So as a last resort he got out the 22.... it was kept by the back door, you know, just in case.
Well, that critter had a summer resort toward the front yard on the side of the hill. Wouldn't surprise me one little bit if he didn't have a connecting tunnel. So depending upon the day, the rifle was either at the front door or the deck door.
I would picture in my mind the part about the flare and the house going up in flames and not just little flames but one of the whoosh flames all over the place or him with the shot gun and going pow, pow pow and no more deck to sit on to watch the leaves on the tress as they grow -- I so miss being out there in the country but I do enjoy intown living too so I shouldn't complain. Each week Tom would tell me something new about how he missed that ground hog. (I'm a better shot than he is and he said I should come out and do it LOL) I was the one the guys would ask to site in their rifles before hunting season started -- having two older brothers who were avid hunters might have had something to do with that. Anyway, each week would be a story to tell of the "one that got away".
Tom called just a little bit ago and said he got that critter. It was a bigun -- as the saying goes. So fat it hung over the shovel that he used to remove it from the premises... I told him he should have made possum soup and he said it wasn't a possum and I said well, it's a cousin....
Now we'll just have to see what the latest adventure will be out at the "ranch".... probably just cutting the grass. That has always been an adventure for Tom...
As TW would say "laffin"
Later....